Sunday, December 20, 2009

Merry Squidmas and Happy Boyfriend!



Dear Globlets,

I figured if I just open Blogger and start typing away, something will come out of it. My boyfriend isn't speaking to me at the moment because he's busy cheating on me with my mother. Now, don't worry, my life isn't quite so dramatic. We're not hill-billies on a reality television show. He's just MSNing her so it's okay.

He's a pretty damn good boyfriend even if he lives in a land far, far away. He's a good man, he really is.
Earlier, we sort of reinvented the lyrics to You Better, You Bet by The Who
Instead of "When I say I love you you say you better... you better, you better, you bet! When I say I need you you scream you better... you better, you better, you bet" we texted each other the following:
Me: When I say I love you you say...
Tentacles: You're crazy
Me: You're crazy, you're crazy, you're crazed. When I say I need you you scream...
Tentacles: Fuck me
Me: I'll fuck you, I'll fuck you, you're fucked.

Yup.

He also got me some nice things for Squidmas. He got me some yummy teas because I drink tea like a fish drinks water (Shh!). He got me some of those children's books from the Mr. Men series, ones, I assume, which he believes I am like most. - Mr. Messy, Little Miss Naughty, Little Miss Sunshine, Little Miss Giggles, and a couple of others I'll include here later because I can't think of them off the top of my head. He also got me some earrings... with... diamonds. Real ones. I thought I was going to die when he got them because I knew how much they were. He got me a gorgeous necklace for my birthday... and he wanted to get me earrings to match. I don't handle the receiving of gifts very well, never mind expensive ones. My family has learned that I'm more thankful and excited about a gift than I actually appear to be. I think I'm getting better at it though. Tentacles' mom gave me a pyjama set and slippers for when I visit them and I put them on right away and they were pretty cozy! I suppose wearing them showed I like them, but that's not why I did. I really liked them. I also wore my earrings. I'm wearing them as I type. They are gorgeous. I just have to not think about how much he paid for them. I gave him a good slap as a thank-you. 0:-)
His mom was like, "You have to let him do it. It makes them feel good." And I was like... >.< "He doesn't have to...!"

>.< He didn't have to. >.<

Hopefully I'll post again before Squidmas but it's possible I won't, so Merry Squidmas! If you're wondering why it's "Squidmas" rather than "Christmas," it's because we believe in the potential of Squid infinitely more-so than we believe in the mythology of Jesus. I hope everyone has a great week! Don't forget to eat all the cookies and cakes and gravy and puddings and whatever other wonderful food you can all get chubbier from... I mean! - Get happier tummies from.

"If I can't be skinny, I'll make my friends fat!"
- Oriana V.
(me)
Srsly. *Copyright.*